Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Collier Report

(This is a writers challenge for "crusaders".)

NEWS FLASH:

Anchor 1: From the confessions of a scar-faced woman we extrapolated the latest: the name Chicken refers to not only a character trait, but an actual alias—bloviated in past middle grade experiences for quirkiness.

Anchor 2: Chicken? Really?

Anchor 1: An alias obtained from a first initial and last name.

 
Anchor 2: Interesting.

Anchor 1: When asked how she came to be scar-faced she confessed to a skiing accident induced by a stray rabbit across the trail at the ripe old age of eight. Her blades narrowly missed the little creature and initiated a life-long hate of carrot-nibblers. Bribed to speak further by a promised block of muenster cheese, she confessed to serenading her family in perpetual life-induced music.

Anchor 2: You mean she sings everything?

Anchor 1: Just about. Come to find out she wrote a musical (aimed at Broadway) about a vampire.

Anchor 2: Everyone writes about vampires these days.

Anchor 1: Yes, these days, but the musical began in 2003 as the result of a dream. For more about that see her recent blog entry.

Anchor 2: Interesting.

Anchor 1: That must be your favorite word.

Anchor 2: Forgive me not having the most fuliguline vocabulary. Not all of us grew up with a dictionary glued to our fingers. I just have one more question.

Anchor 1: What’s that?

Anchor 2: What’s the deal with the cheese?

Anchor 1: I asked about that. She said cheese equals happiness.

Anchor 2: Interesting.

Anchor 1: ... Well there you have it folks. Thanks for tuning it and join us next time to learn which of these reported facts are real, and which are pure fiction.

11 comments:

The Golden Eagle said...

Great Crusader Challenge post!

Hmm . . . tough one! My guess is the lie is the one about the stray rabbit.

Danette said...

I don't think your accident was really caused by a rabbit but nice try! Creative post! Have a nice day!

projectfraeya said...

Great idea for the challenge, really enjoyed that and agree that cheese equals happiness.
I'll agree with the others about the rabbit being the lie.

tinadchayes said...

Maybe the accident caused by the bunny is the lie, or your aren't scarred?
Nice post!

Nick Thomas said...

Happy Presidents’ Pets Day - the day after Presidents' Day, as I like to call it. See my blog for a good ol' howl.

cleemckenzie said...

Dang, I had to look up fuliguline and here I thought I had an extensive vocabulary.

Thanks for the visit to the Write Game. I always appreciate it when I have a new guest.

Kerri Cuev said...

Great post. You hid the lie well, lol. The musical sounds great!

LadyJai said...

Hello fellow crusader! I am a tad bit late, so I just thought I would just say Hi! :D

Hmmmmm rabbits in the snow....possible! But, highly unlikely?

J.L. Campbell said...

The bit about singing everything must be fiction

Lisa Potts said...

Perhaps you don't like cheese after all...

kangaroobee said...

Cute entry! I'll go with rabbits in the snow. I never saw any when I went skiing.